I'm a little teapot

I love tea. It's a fact. Nothing makes me feel more content during the colder seasons than a huge mug of tea. Ironically, my favorite tea mug says 'Mug of Coffee' in big letter on the side. However, I think my tea appreciates the irony. Fall makes me feel nostalgic, romantic, and settled. I love how the air smells, and the way the leaves live their last moments in a brilliant farewell of color. I find myself wishing only to have an endless supply of tea, plenty of agave nectar for sweetness, some creamer for deliciousness, a book to take my imagination to far off lands, fuzzy socks, baggy clothes, and a big chair in which to snuggle in. Fall is my favorite season, and tea is its sweet drink that brings it all home.

As content as this season makes me feel, it also makes me feel restless in a way. The warmth of indoors, blankets, and mugs of steamy tea make me long for a deeper contentment, the kind that comes from knowing. I'm not one of those people that wishes to have every moment of their life planned out from beginning to end, the mystery of life is too exciting and enticing to me. However, I do wish I at least knew which direction I was heading. I'm glad to be nearing the end of my undergrad career, but I have no idea what will follow it. I'm not even sure what direction I wish to take. Some days I know that I will be getting my masters in some area of social history and decay amongst old books that smell slightly of mold and leather. Other times I imagine myself becoming a librarian and attempting to instill the passionate love for books that grips my heart on others. Still other times I secretly wish that I had taken English and that one day I will talk to high schoolers about the magic of all my favorite authors.

I feel a bit swallowed up in the big scheme of things, and sometimes I become overcome with fear. However, today I will just try and enjoy the crisp air and fiery leaves, attempt to stay awake in class, get through work, and come home and after doing homework sink deep within at least a few pages of my book. There I feel that all is truly well. I don't fear the future, and perhaps one day I will feel that same peace in my life outside the fiery leaves of my books.